Tag: OverwhelmtoOpportunity

When Overwhelm Moves Into the Body

What It’s Telling You — and What You Can Do About It

We often think of overwhelm as being “too busy.”
Too many emails. Too many responsibilities. Too much to manage.

But for many of us, overwhelm doesn’t start in the calendar — it starts in the body.

And the truth is, your body always knows before your brain catches up.

What Does Overwhelm Actually Feel Like?

Overwhelm can be quiet or loud, depending on how long it’s been sitting with you.
It may whisper through:

  • Tight shoulders and a clenched jaw
  • Shallow breathing or holding your breath
  • Brain fog, forgetfulness, or decision fatigue
  • Digestive issues or appetite changes
  • A racing heart or sudden wave of anxiety
  • That urgent, irrational need to clean or control something right now

Emotionally, it might feel like:

  • Snapping over small things
  • Numbing out — scrolling, zoning out, overworking
  • Feeling heavy, unmotivated, or disconnected from your voice
  • Crying over “nothing” and then feeling shame for it

If any of this sounds familiar, I want you to know — you’re not broken.
You’ve just been carrying too much, for too long, without enough support.

When the Body Speaks Louder Than Words

A Personal Story

In 2016, I was diagnosed with breast cancer.

At the time, I was in a relationship with a man I loved deeply — someone who struggled with alcoholism. For years, I stayed. I tried. I hoped. I believed that if I loved him hard enough, he’d eventually choose healing.

He didn’t.

He refused to change his life, and I didn’t know how much of his emotional weight I was carrying until it was embedded in my own cells.

It wasn’t until after we ended the relationship — and two years later, after his death — that I discovered he had been living with deep, unspoken trauma. Trauma I didn’t know about. Trauma that shaped him… and shaped the environment I had been living in.

And here’s what I’ve come to understand:

My body held what my heart couldn’t express.

The grief.
The guilt.
The emotional labour of loving someone who couldn’t meet me in the middle.

That diagnosis — though terrifying — became the catalyst for me to stop ignoring my needs and start listening to what my body had been trying to tell me for years. Decades even.

This is the work I now support others with — because overwhelm doesn’t always look like chaos.
Sometimes it looks like quietly surviving.

Coaching vs. Therapy: What’s the Difference?

This is an important distinction — and one I speak about openly with clients.

Therapy focuses on healing past wounds, mental health, and trauma. It’s clinically grounded, and often addresses the why behind what’s showing up.

Coaching is future- and action-oriented. It’s for people who are generally functioning — but feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or unclear. Coaching helps you reconnect to your body, shift patterns, and move ahead with grounded support.

One is not better than the other. Sometimes people do both — and sometimes one naturally leads to the other.

Your well-being is always my priority, and I support you in whatever path feels right for you.

How I Support Clients Through Overwhelm

My coaching work is rooted in the belief that you already hold wisdom. I simply help you hear it again. You already hold wisdom. I simply help you hear it again.

Here’s what that looks like:

1. We bring awareness to what’s real

We name what you’re feeling — physically, emotionally, energetically. We uncover the patterns and get honest about what you’ve been carrying (and why). No judgment. Just space.

2. We reconnect you to your inner cues

Overwhelm disconnects you from your body’s signals. I help you slow down, listen in, and rebuild trust in your own voice.

3. We create simple, grounded next steps

We work gently but steadily. You’ll leave with clarity, practical tools, and a feeling of momentum — without bypassing what’s hard or forcing toxic positivity.

You don’t need to push harder.
You need support that actually sees you.

From Awareness to Action: What Shows Up First?

Sometimes the first step to clarity is simply noticing.
So let me ask:

When you’re overwhelmed, what shows up first?

Do you feel it in your chest?
Do you get short with people you love?
Do you suddenly crave control, or check out entirely?

Start there.
Name it.
No judgment — just awareness.

You don’t have to fix it all today.
You just have to listen.

Journaling Prompt

Take a moment to reflect and write:

“Where in my body do I first feel overwhelmed, and what is it telling me?”

There’s no right or wrong answer — just your truth.

💬 Ready for Support?

If you’re navigating overwhelm and want gentle, grounded coaching that helps you come home to yourself — I’m here.

🟣 Book a free 30-minute clarity call
This is a no-pressure space. We’ll explore what’s feeling heavy or unclear. We’ll find out whether working together is the right fit.
It’s not a coaching session — it’s a chance to connect, ask questions, and get a sense of what’s possible.

🟣 Learn more about 1:1 coaching with me
🟣 Or send me a message if you’re not sure where to start.

You don’t have to carry it all alone.
Let’s take the first step — together.

Embrace Your True Self: Coaching for Personal Growth

— and maybe, the beginning of something new for you.

If this series stirred something in you…

If you recognized pieces of yourself in the stories…

If you’ve been nodding along, quietly thinking,

“That’s me. I’ve been holding back. I’ve been disappearing…”

Then I want you to know: you’re not alone. And you’re not stuck.

You don’t have to live in the loop of people-pleasing, perfectionism, or self-abandonment anymore.

✨ There is another way — one that is grounded, gentle, and rooted in you.

Your truth. Your needs. Your becoming.

If you’re ready to explore what that looks like with support, I have a few coaching spaces opening this month.

This isn’t about fixing you — you’re not broken.

This is about coming home to yourself.

💌 Comment below “I’m ready” if you want to talk about what working together would look like.

No pressure, just a real, heart-led conversation.

You deserve a life that feels like yours. 💜

Leave a comment

When ‘Nice’ Becomes a Cage

Boundaries don’t have to be loud or dramatic to change your life. Sometimes it’s the small, quiet choices — like turning off your phone, taking five minutes to breathe, or saying ‘not right now’ — that slowly bring you back to yourself. These tiny acts of self-respect build a life where you no longer have to run on empty to feel worthy.

Part 4: Tiny Boundaries That Change Everything

When we think about boundaries, it’s easy to picture the big moments — a bold “no,” a line in the sand, a major shift in a relationship.

But here’s what often goes unnoticed:

🧩 The smallest boundaries can make the biggest difference.

These are the quiet ones. The ones you make just for you. They don’t always get noticed — but they change your life from the inside out.

Tiny boundaries might look like:

  • Letting your phone go unanswered for an hour while you rest
  • Not checking your work inbox the moment you wake up
  • Saying, “I need to think about that,” instead of giving an automatic yes
  • Closing your office door for 10 minutes of stillness
  • Blocking off one weekend day for you and protecting it
  • Choosing not to explain your “no” to someone who wouldn’t hear your “yes” anyway

Each of these small actions becomes a thread in the fabric of self-respect. Over time, they:

  • Build emotional safety
  • Reduce resentment
  • Calm your nervous system
  • Rewire the belief that your needs are secondary

I remember when I started with micro-boundaries — it was awkward. Saying no, even gently, brought up guilt. But something powerful happened:
Each time I honored myself, I felt stronger. More whole. Less burnt out.

🔑 Tips to Start Practicing Tiny Boundaries Today:

  1. Start with one area where you feel most depleted (work, family, time alone).
  2. Pick one small action you can take consistently (e.g., no phone during lunch).
  3. Track how it makes you feel — empowered? Guilty? Free? Just notice.
  4. Anchor it to your values. Remember: every “no” creates room for a deeper “yes.”
  5. Use language that feels kind and clear, like:
    • “I won’t be available after 6pm, but I’ll check in tomorrow.”
    • “I’m not able to add anything else right now.”
    • “I need a little space before I respond — thank you for understanding.”

These tiny boundaries may feel small — but they’re sacred. They remind you that your time, energy, and peace matter.

If you’re ready to explore what tiny boundaries could look like for you, I’d love to invite you to a Clarity Call — a free 60-minute session where we can talk about your unique challenges and how to take your first steps toward freedom, without guilt or overwhelm.

📅 Book your spot here

Up next in this series:
Boundaries with Family, Partners, and Work — Without the Guilt

With care,
Erika

When ‘Nice’ Becomes a Cage

Saying ‘no’ can feel like betrayal — of others’ expectations, of the role we’ve always played, of the peace we’re afraid to disrupt. But every time we say ‘yes’ when we mean ‘no,’ we abandon ourselves a little more. Saying no isn’t rejection — it’s protection. It’s how we honor our limits, our time, and our truth.

Part 3: Why Saying No is Hard — But So Important

Saying no can feel like the hardest thing in the world.

It’s as if you’re breaking a promise you never actually made.
As if you’re letting down someone who depends on you.
As if you’re betraying the very people who love and count on you.

If you’re anything like me, you’ve carried this weight for years —
That tight knot in your stomach when your heart screams “no” but your mouth whispers “yes.”
The quiet, relentless self-judgment that follows.
The endless worry: Will they still like me? Will they still need me? Will I be enough?

Here’s a truth I’ve come to hold close:
Saying no is not betrayal — it is honesty.

It’s an act of courage — a clear, loving boundary that honors your energy, your time, your wellbeing.
It’s saying to yourself with quiet power:
“I am worthy of respect. I am worthy of care. I am worth honoring.”

I’ve been in that place where saying no felt like slamming a door — loud, jarring, and scary.
I feared losing people, opportunities, love.
But over time, I learned something transformative:

The people who truly care about you don’t want you to say yes at the cost of your soul.
They want your real presence — not your exhaustion.
They want your honesty — not your hidden resentment.

Saying no also creates space for more meaningful “yes” moments — when you have the energy, enthusiasm, and willingness to give freely without feeling drained.

When you say no, you open space — not just for yourself, but for others too.
You invite them to step up, take responsibility, and honor your limits with respect.
Saying no becomes a gift — a way to create healthier, more balanced connections.

So today, I want to ask you:

What’s one moment, one situation, where you struggled to say no — but deep down knew you needed to?

Hit reply and share your story with me.
Your experience matters, and sometimes just naming the struggle is the first step toward freedom.

If you’re not ready to share yet, that’s okay too — simply hold space for yourself in this moment and consider how saying no could open the door to more peace and power in your life.

Up next:
Tiny Boundaries That Change Everything

We’ll explore small, manageable ways to reclaim your space and your energy — without overwhelm or guilt.

If this message resonates, please forward it to someone who might need to hear it today.

With kindness,
Erika

When ‘Nice’ Becomes a Cage

Boundaries aren’t walls to keep people out — they’re bridges to deeper, healthier relationships. For too long, I believed saying ‘yes’ made me kind and saying ‘no’ made me difficult. But the truth? Boundaries are the most radical act of self-love I’ve ever learned.

Part 2: Boundaries: What They Really Are.

Boundaries get a bad rap.

They’re often seen as walls. Barriers. Coldness.

The thing we put up when we want to push others away.

But here’s the thing:

Boundaries aren’t about shutting people out — they’re about holding space.

Space for your needs.

Space for your feelings.

Space for your health.

Space to be yourself.

A boundary is a gentle but firm yes to what you need, and a clear no to what drains you.

It’s a way of caring for yourself that says:

“I matter. My energy matters. My wellbeing matters. “

I’ll be honest — setting boundaries has not come easily to me.

I am a lifelong yes person — eager to help, quick to say yes, and slow to say no.

For a long time, I thought saying yes was kindness.

But over time, I realized that when we don’t set boundaries, people can — and sometimes do — take advantage.

It took me years to learn that saying no isn’t selfish; it’s self-care.

And sometimes, setting a boundary sounds as simple as:

  • “I’d love to help, but I don’t have the capacity right now.”
  • “I need some time to think about that before I commit.”
  • “I’m not available for that, but I hope it goes well.”
  • “I don’t feel comfortable with that topic — can we shift the conversation?”
  • “That doesn’t work for me.” (Full stop. No justification required.)

Too often, we confuse boundaries with rejection.

We worry saying no will make others angry or disappointed.

Or that setting limits means we’re being selfish or unkind.

But here’s a secret:

Boundaries are kindness — to yourself and to others.

They teach people how to treat you.

They create trust.

They build respect.

When you set a boundary, you’re not saying “I don’t care.”

You’re saying:

“I care about myself enough to protect my heart and my time.”

Of course, boundaries can feel scary or unfamiliar.

Especially if you’ve spent years putting everyone else first.

But every boundary you set is a step toward freedom.

Freedom to show up fully — without resentment, exhaustion, or overwhelm.

In the next post, we’ll explore:

Why Saying No Feels Like a Betrayal — And Why It’s Not

If this speaks to you, I’d love to hear your thoughts.

Hit reply or share this with someone who could use a little boundary kindness today.

With care,

Erika

When ‘Nice’ Becomes a Cage

Somewhere along the way, we were taught that being a ‘good woman’ meant being agreeable, accommodating, and selfless — even at the cost of our well-being. But behind every forced smile and quiet ‘I’m fine’ is a woman who’s been shrinking herself to fit a story that was never hers. It’s time we question the myth of nice — and reclaim the fullness of who we are.

Part 1: The Myth of a Good Woman — How ‘Being Nice’ Has Cost Us Too Much

From the earliest moments of our lives, we are taught a subtle, unspoken lesson:

To be good is to be nice.
To be seen is to be quiet.
To be loved is to be accommodating.

It sounds simple enough, wrapped in gentle words:
“Be polite.”
“Don’t make waves.”
“Take care of others before yourself.”

But beneath this gentle teaching lies a heavy, invisible weight.

Because what we call being nice is often a complex, exhausting dance of survival — a survival learned from trauma, fear, and the desire to belong.

We learn to smooth our edges so we don’t scare others away.
We carry the emotional baggage of everyone around us — the unspoken needs, the silent hurts — as if it were our own.
We apologize for taking up space, for expressing pain, for being too much.
We fold ourselves into silence even when inside, we’re screaming.

And all the while, we wear this mask of niceness like armor — fragile, and yet so demanding.

But here is the truth most don’t say out loud:

Being nice is not the same as being kind.

Kindness is rooted in presence — an authentic honoring of both ourselves and others.

Niceness, by contrast, is often rooted in performance — a scripted behavior shaped by fear of rejection, conflict, or abandonment.

When we choose niceness over truth, we sacrifice the most vital parts of ourselves: our voice, our boundaries, our worth.

We swallow our honest feelings to keep the peace.
We enable harmful patterns because confronting them feels too risky.
We become invisible caretakers, holding the world together at the expense of our own sanity.

But silence is not kindness.
Self-abandonment is not compassion.
Saying yes when every fiber of your body says no is not generosity — it is a slow erasure of self.

Behind many smiles lies a quiet desperation: burnout, loneliness, resentment, and exhaustion from pretending that everything is fine.

In our last series, we named the invisible work that women do every day — the emotional labor that holds families, friendships, and workplaces together.

Now, it’s time to name the cost of that labor.

It’s time to stop over-giving, to stop sacrificing ourselves for others’ comfort.

Because you deserve more than survival.

You deserve boundaries that feel like safety — not prisons.
You deserve relationships rooted in respect — not fear.
You deserve to say “no” without guilt, and to hold your ground with love.

This series is a quiet revolution — a reclaiming of your power, your voice, and your heart.

It’s not about shutting people out or becoming cold.
It’s about becoming whole — fully alive and unapologetically you.

If you feel tired of carrying invisible burdens, if you’ve ever felt crushed beneath the weight of being “nice,” this series is for you.

Together, we will unravel the myths, heal the wounds, and build a new foundation — one where kindness and strength live hand in hand.

Because your worth is not measured by how pleasant you are.

It is measured by your courage to be real.

Coming up next:
What a Boundary Actually Is — And What It Isn’t

We’ll break down the myths around boundaries and explore what they look like when they’re rooted in love — not fear.

If this resonates, I’d love to hear from you.
Hit reply, or forward this to someone who needs to know: you don’t have to earn your worth by being pleasant.

With warmth,
Erika

From Overwhelm to Opportunity: My Journey and Why I’m Here to Help

Have you ever felt like you’re just barely holding it together? Like the weight of life keeps piling on, and you don’t know where to find the strength to keep going?

That was me — decades ago, juggling the chaos of raising three incredible daughters on my own. My oldest has cerebral palsy, which meant countless doctors’ appointments and therapies, while I made sure her sisters never felt invisible. I showed up to every ballet recital, gymnastics meet, and school event — even when I was utterly exhausted.

At the same time, I was working full-time and going to university, trying to keep us afloat. Some days, it felt like I was barely surviving.

But the challenges weren’t just physical. I was healing from surviving an abusive relationship that tried to steal my voice and my self-worth. Finding my way out of that darkness was terrifying and freeing all at once — it was the moment I truly chose myself.

In 2016, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. That diagnosis shook me to my core, forcing me to stop and reflect on what really matters. It showed me the power of resilience and grace — and that strength doesn’t mean doing it all alone. It means asking for help and allowing yourself to heal.

For years, people encouraged me to become a coach. They saw the strength and heart I carried. But it took me time to say yes — scared but hopeful, unsure but ready. When I finally took that step, everything fell into place. Coaching isn’t just what I do; it’s who I am.

Since then, I’ve had the privilege of supporting women from all walks of life: executives balancing high-pressure careers and family, caregivers devoted to their loved ones, single moms holding down the fort alone, survivors reclaiming their power, and women simply striving for balance in a busy world.

Each story is different, but the overwhelm and the longing for peace is something we all share. Their courage inspires me every day — and reminds me why this work matters so deeply.

You deserve support. You deserve space. You deserve to come home to yourself.

If this story speaks to you, know you are not alone. Whether you’re overwhelmed, uncertain, or just craving clarity, I’m here to walk alongside you.

Ready to take that next step? I invite you to explore my services or book a free 60-minute Clarity Call. Let’s walk this path together.

Part 1: What is Emotional Labor – And Why Does it Leave Us Feeling so Exhausted.

Have you ever felt like you’re carrying a heavy invisible load — juggling your own feelings while managing the emotions of everyone around you?

That weight has a name: emotional labor.

It’s the unseen effort behind remembering birthdays, coordinating family schedules, calming tensions, offering a listening ear, and often keeping your own struggles tucked away.

This labor isn’t just about “being nice” — it’s about the deep, ongoing mental and emotional energy we invest in relationships and communities.

For many women, emotional labor is a daily reality — a silent drain that leaves us exhausted and unseen.

I know this well.

I’ve spent years balancing work, family, and personal growth, often feeling like I’m disappearing under the weight of invisible expectations.

But recognizing emotional labor for what it is changed everything.

What Does Emotional Labor Look Like?

  • Organizing and remembering important dates
  • Smoothing over conflicts quietly
  • Checking in on others’ emotional well-being
  • Suppressing your own feelings to protect others
  • Holding space for others, even when you’re running on empty

When you add these up, emotional labor is a full-time job — without a paycheck or recognition.

Why It’s So Draining

Because emotional labor is largely invisible and expected, it can lead to:

  • Exhaustion
  • Stress
  • Feeling undervalued

Suppressing your own needs while managing others’ emotions can also cause burnout, anxiety, and strained relationships.

The Power of Naming Emotional Labor

Naming this invisible load is the first step toward reclaiming your energy and peace. It allows you to:

  • Set boundaries
  • Seek support
  • Prioritize self-care

What’s Next?

Over the next few days, I’ll be sharing practical tools and reflections to help you navigate emotional labor and reconnect with your calm.

✨ You don’t have to hold it all together alone.

Let’s start releasing the invisible weight — together.

Find the Right Support for You →
From short resets to deeper containers, there’s space for your healing and growth here.

Emotional Labor: The Invisible Work You Carry

This infographic names the quiet, constant effort many of us do to manage emotions, smooth over tensions, and keep everything running—often without recognition.

✨ Starting today, I’m launching a 4-day series to unpack emotional labor, its impact, and practical ways to reclaim your energy and boundaries.

💛 Follow along, and be sure to subscribe so you don’t miss the deeper dives later today!

#EmotionalLabor #InvisibleWork #OverwhelmToOpportunity #4DaySeries #SelfCareStartsHere

The Space Between Breaking Down & Breaking Open

What breast cancer, heartbreak, and healing taught me about surrender, strength, and starting again.

Dear reader,

This isn’t just a story about illness—it’s about what happens when life asks us to stop. About what we discover in the silence, the surrender, and the slow return to ourselves. If you’ve ever carried too much for too long, or quietly unraveled beneath the surface, I hope you find something here that reminds you: you’re not alone.

In 2016, I was diagnosed with breast cancer.

I still remember the silence in the room after the words were said. It was like time fractured—part of me frozen in place, the other part sprinting ahead to everything I might lose. My health, my work, my future.

At the time, I was running my own successful business—coaching, creating, supporting others through their own transformation. I loved it. It felt aligned with who I was and how I moved through the world. But when the diagnosis came, I couldn’t show up in the same way anymore. My energy had to turn inward, toward healing. Toward survival.

There were surgeries. Reconstruction. Five years of treatment. My calendar changed, my relationships shifted, and the identity I had built around doing began to crumble. I had no choice but to surrender—not to the illness itself, but to the truth that I needed to be still, to receive care, to rest.

At the same time, I was also getting out of a toxic relationship with an alcoholic. Navigating recovery as a single woman, while facing cancer treatment, was an immense challenge—one that demanded strength I didn’t know I had. That journey through emotional upheaval and healing deepened my understanding of resilience and self-compassion.

I made the difficult decision to close my business and focus on what my body—and spirit—desperately needed: care, stillness, space. Eventually, I returned to work in healthcare—this time not just as a professional, but as someone deeply changed by what it means to heal. That return led me to my current role supporting teams in building systems of care that are both effective and human-centered.

Then in 2019, I earned my certification as a Life and Wellness Coach with ICF Accreditation. That part of me—the mentor, the guide, the witness—had never truly disappeared. The passion I had once set down began to stir again—quiet at first, then louder. I started to dream about creating something unique and grounded, something that truly spoke to the experiences of women navigating burnout, responsibility, and self-erasure.

And recently, through conversations with women—about overwhelm, emotional labor, identity, and the constant pressure to hold it all together—I realized that what I’d been sitting on wasn’t just knowledge. It was a well of lived experience, insight, and heart—and it was time to share it.

Overwhelm to Opportunity was born.

Not as a slogan. Not as a coaching “niche.” But as a deeply personal invitation—a pathway back to self.

Because breast cancer didn’t just challenge me physically. It stripped everything down to the essentials. It revealed how many of us are operating from depletion. How often we override our needs. How easy it is to lose ourselves in responsibility, care work, and the myth of having it all together.

What I offer now is rooted in that clarity.
It’s for the woman who’s tired of fixing and striving and holding it all.
It’s for the woman who’s ready to soften, realign, and come home to herself.

I know what it feels like to fall apart quietly.
To be strong for everyone else.
To wonder what happens if you finally stop pushing.

And I know what it takes to rebuild—slowly, intentionally, from the inside out.

If you’re in a season of holding it all—or slowly finding your way back to yourself—know that you’re not alone. Overwhelm to Opportunity was born from this very edge: the space between breaking down and breaking open.

This is an invitation—for you to honor your story, to hold space for your healing, and to know that transformation often begins when we stop trying to hold it all together.

🌿 I’d love to hear from you.
If this resonates, feel free to hit reply or leave a comment. And if there’s someone in your life who might need this message, I’d be honored if you shared it with them.

Until next time,
Erika